How to Ease Out of Social Distancing When You Have Social Anxiety

How to Ease Out of Social Distancing When You Have Social Anxiety

If you’re a naturally socially anxious person, you may be struggling with the whole quarantine thing. And I don’t mean being IN quaranitne (that was the easy part!), I’m talking about coming OUT of quarantine.

If you’re anything like me, then social distancing was probably a breeze for you. You didn’t have to socialize with anyone, and you didn‘t have to go through any social awkwardness. Score!

But now that the world is slowly starting to open back up again, you may have some anxious thoughts floating around your head, like “uh, I didn’t know how to talk to people in the first place – how am I supposed to just jump right back into this whole social thing now?!”.

What makes it even worse is that there’s now this added awkwardness because you still have to stay distanced from people, so you can’t shake hands or hug. This then begs the question – “what the heck do I do instead?!“. 

Well, have no fear! This is exactly what I’m here for!

Here are my top 4 tips on how to ease out of quarantine if you’re socially anxious

1. Write a list of social situations that make you anxious

Everyone reacts differently to different social situations. Take some time here to write a list of all the social situations that trigger anxiety for you. Is it running into people you haven’t seen in a long time? Is it hugging? Is it small talk? Big groups? One-on-one chats? Everyone is totally different. After you’ve done this, take a moment to write down whether or not COVID has made each situation better or worse.

For me, I’ve noticed that I get social anxiety when I hang out with aquaintances. I’m not close enough to them that the conversation flows easily, so I find it can sometimes feel a bit awkward.

This, of course, gets even worse when you add social distancing into the equation. Now these already-awkward acquaintance hang-outs turn even more uncomfortable because 1) we have to stay awkwardly far apart and 2) conversation gets old REAL fast (explaining what you’ve been doing – or not doing – during quarantine really doesn’t make for dazzling conversation).

Another anxiety-inducing situation for me is seeing people out in public when I’m not “prepared” for them. For example, when I’m grocery shopping and I see someone I *kind of* know. I never know if I should wave, smile, stop and talk, or just keep walking!

This is also worse with COVID because now everyone’s wearing a mask, so it’s hard to see what their facial expression is…which makes it even harder to know how to act! Ahh!

2. Write down ways that you can make each situation less anxiety-inducing

Once you’ve identified your anxiety-inducing sitatuons, it’s time to start thinking of ways you can make yourself feel more comfortable with them.

But keep in mind, “avoiding” is NOT (I repeat NOT) a valid solution! Going through life attempting to just dodge every situation that makes you feel uncomfortable is only going to add to the problem. Trust me, it may make you feel good in the moment, but it will not serve you in the long term.

Instead, try to think of little things you can do to just relieve some of your stress. It could be as simple as doing some deep breathing exercises before going into a nerve-racking social situation.

For me, I found that the most effective way to combat my social anxiety was to just expose myself to situations that made me feel anxious. I didn’t like it at first, but the more I forced myself to do it, the more comfortable I got with it. If you can get used to being comfortable even in slightly awkward situations, a whole new world will open up for you! 

3. Prepare yourself beforehand

This is something I’ve been doing for-ever! And I promise you, it works – VERY WELL.

If I’m going into a social situation where I know I may not have many things to talk about, I prepare a little list in advance of stories I’ll share or questions I’ll ask. I know, I know – it may sound a bit “over-achiever”, but hey – it does the job!

This is especially helpful for coming out of quarantine and reconeccting with people you maybe haven’t seen in several months. It can be super awkward knowing how to summarize an entire 4-5 months of your life where you’ve been doing prettttty much nothing at home!

Here’s a great list of conversation starters to get you inspired by ‘people expert’ Vanessa Van Edwards!

4. Find ways to practice – start small, and slowly work up

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – the BEST way to overcome your anxiety is to face your fears head-on. This goes for social anxiety as well!

Start by choosing low-stress social situations. What makes you slightly anxious, but not overly anxious? Talking to strangers on the phone? Talking to friends on the phone? Meeting people for coffee? Again, it’s totally different for everyone.

Once you’ve gotten used to exposing yourself to these “low-risk” situations, raise the bar a little bit. Keep working yourself up to more anxiety-inducing situations bit-by-bit until finally, you’re ready to face your biggest fears. This is called ‘exposure therapy’, and it works amazingly. In fact, it was the #1 way I was able to overcome social anxiety myself!

Other tips for coming out of quarantine

I know it can be awkward meeting people in person but still staying 6 feet apart. You may feel like you’re being cold by not hugging someone or shaking their hands. I say, just address the elephant in the room! Try saying outright, “I’d shake your hand (or hug you), but you probably don’t want my germs!”. You’d be surprised at how well this can break the tension!

I also suggest mirroring the other person and just doing what they do. This can release a lot of pressure on you to “do the right thing”. Sometimes, it’s good to be a follower!

Below, you’ll find links to some more helpful resources that will guide you in getting to the root cause of your social anxiety so that you can learn how to overcome it – I highly recommend checking them out! 

Sagesse ("Say Jess")

Sagesse ("Say Jess")

Owner of Mindaya

Hey guys, it’s Sagesse – the face behind website! I’m dedicated to helping you find freedom your anxiety and overcome the mental obstacles that are standing in the way of your best life!
12 Ways to Make Progress on Your Goals When You Feel Completely Stuck

12 Ways to Make Progress on Your Goals When You Feel Completely Stuck

Sometimes it can be really hard working towards a goal. You have all of these great plans, but then there comes various roadblocks, self-doubt, a change in circumstances, COVID!!, lack of motivation, and whatever else life throws at you.

I’ve always had tons of pretty hefty goals (some that I’ve reached, some I haven’t, and some I’m still working on) and I KNOW the struggle!

That’s why I’ve compiled a great list of things that I find always help me to find my motivation again and bust down those roadblocks! And you can do them super quickly to get back on track!

So here we go!

Ways to progress on your goals when you feel STUCK!

1. Make a list of everything you need to do. 

Just putting pen to paper can help create a flow of ideas. Make a list of everything that is making you feel stuck. Then you can go over it and see if there are ways that you can get unstuck with that. Basically just have a brainstorm session and it can help reset you and get new ideas that you might not have thought of.

2. Do some research. 

Take an hour or two to research common roadblocks that people commonly have with your type of goal. See if you can find any insight into how to overcome those roadblocks. You can even reach out to people who have had the same struggles as you and ask them about what they did to get out of those blocks. This will give you a lot of motivation and ideas to start overcoming your own roadblocks.

3. Take a break

Reset yourself for a bit. Give your brain a chance to relax a little bit. While it’s resting, you might actually get some new ideas or a new viewpoint of the whole situation.

4. Reprioritize

You might be feeling stuck because you’re not actually working on the right things and they might actually be slowing you down. 

Take a look at the things that are actually working for you and actually making your life and your work better and try to put those on the top of your to do list. You can even use a priority matrix which can help you figure out the most important things for you to be doing right now.

5. Listen to some inspirational podcasts or read some inspirational blogs

 I always find that getting some outside motivation can help you to re-jig your brain and make you feel way more motivated.

6. Watch a movie that relates to your life right now

I find that movies, tv shows, and other creative media can help me spark creative ideas. Even if they aren’t fully related to what you’re doing, they actually just have a way of sparking something in your brain and making you think differently and possibly lead to some new ideas and motivation.

7. Reach out to someone who is currently doing what you would like to do

 Not only will you get some really good advice, but this will also help build your network and maybe bring you new opportunities in the future.

8. Join a Facebook group in your niche

There are so many awesome Facebook groups out there and so many people who just want to help you or who are going through the same things as you. 

I’m in a couple of groups and the women in the groups are so supportive and so engaged that it really does bring you motivation. And people tend to ask a lot of questions which might help you with problems you have been wondering about.

9. Forgive yourself and get out of the shame spiral that’s causing you to get down on yourself

Sometimes we get caught in these negative thinking patterns that cause us to feel unmotivated and unengaged in our goals. We get down on ourselves, lose our confidence, and then it becomes a downwards spiral.

So to fix this, you need to acknowledge that everyone makes mistakes, can be lazy sometimes, and can feel stuck – and you’re no different! Don’t let your past mistakes stop you from continuing NOW.

 

10. Get an accountability buddy

Even if they aren’t doing the same things as you, you guys can keep each other accountable on your own goals. 

This is a great way to fuel your motivation and help you to take action! I almost always need some external motivation to do the work that I need to do to reach my goals.

11. Remind yourself of why you want to reach your goal

You might realize that the reason you feel stuck is because you’re actually not as excited about your goals anymore, so maybe you need to shift your goals a bit. 

Or you just need to be reminded of the end goal, So that you can just give your motivation a little boost.

12. Find ways to enjoy the process. 

You don’t want to only focus on the end goal, you need to find a way to make the process enjoyable or else it’s just not worth it.

Now if you want a little bit of extra help with this, I have an awesome free goal planner that helps you figure out all of this stuff, like motivation, prioritizing, and other uncommon but crucial things that go into planning your goals. (By signing up, you’ll also get access to TONS more free resources!)

Sagesse ("Say Jess")

Sagesse ("Say Jess")

Owner of Mindaya

Hey guys, it’s Sagesse – the face behind website! I’m dedicated to helping you find freedom your anxiety and overcome the mental obstacles that are standing in the way of your best life!
The Ultimate Work-From-Home Guide (11 Steps to Build the Perfect Routine)

The Ultimate Work-From-Home Guide (11 Steps to Build the Perfect Routine)

You’re working from home now.

This is what you’ve been waiting for. You get to do work in your pyjamas and can take as many breaks as you want!

This is great!

But somehow, and you don’t quite know how it happened, your day has turned into a blend of working, tv, snacking constantly, and now you’ve spent the whole day half-working and not getting as nearly as much done as you thought you would.

It’s an easy trap to get into (and I know because I was in it for a loooong time), but I have found some great tips to help you to work from home without distractions or 

Let’s take a look at the ideal work-from-home routine!

Disclaimer: Products on this page may contain affiliate links. We only promote products that we think are super awesome and will provide value to you! You can read more about our terms here.

Step 1: Develop a daily ritual!

This is essential to keep yourself from slipping into the “work-from-home limbo”, where you don’t know what you’re doing, where you’re going, or even what day it is! Humans thrive on rituals and familiarity.
I’ve been working at home for a while and I realized that I don’t like having my day overly planned, but I do like to have a few non-negotiables throughout my day!

Step 2: More specifically, develop a morning ritual that you look forward to so that it makes waking up easier! 

I find it incredibly difficult to wake up if I don’t have somewhere to be, so I use a few tricks to help me to get out of bed!
Such as
  • looking forward to my morning coffee
  • having a shower
  • having my smoothie bowl and toast for breakfast!
It can be INCREDIBLY hard to get out of bed if you don’t have something FORCING you to, so if you can, try to schedule something in the morning that will get you up and out of bed! Maybe like a phone call with a friend who also needs some extra motivation, or find a live, online workout class or meditation! Get creative!

 

Step 3: Have a dedicated workspace. 

It can be oh-so tempting to work from the couch, but the posture you have on a couch signals your body to be too relaxed and definitely not in “work-mode” 
This will also separate your “work-life” from your “home-life”.
If you get bored sitting in one place all day, then have your main workspace (for getting the really intense stuff done) and then have a back-up workspace, when you don’t need to concentrate as much.

Step 4: Keep up with your scheduling

First of all – use google calendar!!

This is the best scheduling program! You can make multiple calendars for the different things you have going on (so you can see them either all together or separately!)

It’s so easy and you can drag and drop anything you have scheduled! Which is especially great if you have unforeseen things come up in your day – with trust me, happens a lot when you’re working at home!

Bonus: make sure you schedule in breaks!!!

Step 5: Use productivity techniques

Technique 1: The Pomodoro Technique

At home, your days are less structured without meetings, etc. So it’s important to give yourself some structure. The pomodoro technique is great for that!

You basically just yourself 30 min to 1 hr bursts of work, followed by a short break! Super simple and will keep your momentum going and force you to do some solid focused work, with a little reward after!

Productivity Technique 2: Only set 6 tasks for the day

This is a good rule of thumb for whether you work from home or at an office! This has generally been found to be the magic number so that you don’t get overwhelmed by the idea of too many tasks. 

This is a common rule of people who know that simplicity is the key to productivity. Just set yourself six tasks that you know you can get done. It will work wonders!

Productivity technique 3: Schedule your days with variance, depending on the task

Some days might require long chunks of focused work, others might require short bursts of focus to get lots of little tasks done. Don’t be afraid to change up your daily schedule to match that!

Check some other scheduling tips and productivity misconceptions here!

Step 6: Eliminate distractions

When you don’t necessarily have a strict schedule and you are at home (where there are TONS of distractions).

Here are three simple ways to help with that!

  1. Have a semi-secluded work station.
  2. Let your family know when it’s time for you to work – and ask them politely not to interrupt you. (This might not work if you have kids). But schedule specific times for when they can come into your space or schedule some specific quality time with them throughout the day
  3. Use the freedom app! It blocks any distracting website or app of your choosing on your computer and your phone. Honestly SO helpful! Which brings me to my next point:

Step 7: Invest in a productivity app!

I’m usually not a fan of productivity apps, because there are just too many out there and they can sort of bog down your mind.

However, freedom is an app that simply blocks all of the distracting websites and apps for you! And it works on your phone too! 

When you’re working at home, it can be so easy to get distracted by websites and apps on your phone, especially when your boss isn’t there to monitor you. 

This app is what has saved me while working from home!

Step 8 : Keep designated work hours (and have a cut-off time).

This one is pretty simple, but seriously, have a cut-off time! It can be tempting to try and just get a bit more done, but then you end up working all day!

The beauty of working from home, though, is that it can be whenever you want! So if you sleep in, you can still fit your work day in!

However, I would still encourage your cut-off time to be no later than 6 so that you have motivation to wake up earlier!

Otherwise, you’ll let yourself sleep in later and later, until eventually, you’re working from 12-9! (which trust me, is not great, I have fallen into that schedule…. not so great!)

 

 Step 9: Make Time For exercise!

If your whole day revolves around being at home, it can be really hard to think about getting out and exercising.

It was a lot easier when you could just go to the gym while you were out already! But thanks to Covid right now, that’s not really an option!

So put it in your plan and get used to either just going for a nice walk or doing a fun at home workout! There are so many on instagram! Search @demibagby on instagram she has a whole bunch of fun at-home, full-body workouts that are really fun!

The BONUS of being at home, is that you can just dance with the music blasting as a warm up! You can’t do that at a gym! Well you could if you’re very confident!

Step 10: Keep up your meal prep (or start it).

Did you used to pack a lunch for work every day? Keep that up! Otherwise it’ll take too much time out of your work hours to make a lunch!

Or take one day a week to prepare your lunches! You can check out this amazing weekly meal planner that I sell on etsy! It’s so helpful and it’s the only thing that has gotten me to do my meal prepping!

Step 11: Plan something fun after work! and on your weekend!

Don’t let work spill into your weekend. Just don’t.

Even if you don’t think you do, you NEED a weekend to refresh your brain! 

It can be tempting to squeeze in more work on the weekend (if you’re that type of person! haha, I am depending on what I’m doing), but if you don’t give yourself a nice, big break! 

Otherwise, you’ll burn out! 

You need to have fun and enjoy yourself frequently!

If you want some extra help with your productivity, time-management, and scheduling – check out my free time-management and productivity!

It’s 5 sessions to help you with goal-setting, productivity misconceptions, organization systems, habits, and mindset! It really gives you everything! You can sign up below!

Sagesse ("Say Jess")

Sagesse ("Say Jess")

Owner of Mindaya

Hey guys, it’s Sagesse – the face behind website! I’m dedicated to helping you find freedom your anxiety and overcome the mental obstacles that are standing in the way of your best life!

100 Fun and Productive Things To Do When You’re Bored at Home

100 Fun and Productive Things To Do When You’re Bored at Home

Right now is a bit of a trying time for a lot of us.

Many of our cherished activities have been taken away from us and we feel like we are in jail in our own homes!

We’re so not used to having to occupy ourselves and there’s only so much Netflix one can handle!

So to help you all (and to remind myself), I have compiled a big list of things you can do when you’re bored at home!

So without further ado, here are 100 things to do when you’re bored at home!

Disclaimer: Products on this page may contain affiliate links. We only promote products that we think are super awesome and will provide value to you! You can read more about our terms here.

If you’re bored and *sigh* alone, trying being more social, virtually! 

One of the most difficult things for me right now is not having my usual outlets.

I’m a fairly social person, so I’m going a bit crazy!

Even if you are less social or a bit more on the introverted side, human connection is still an important thing to maintain. And at least in this case, you can be in complete control of who you talk to!

 Try to overcome your boredom and add some social aspects into your life through:

 1. Zoom Call – just do it! Block out some time in your calendar!

 2. Happy hour with friends (over video chat)

 3. Write your friends a letter about how much you appreciate them

4. Challenge your friends to an online competition in some kind of video game

5. Reach out to people you haven’t talked to in a while

6. Schedule a distance walk with a friend if you’re in an area with enough space (you can get a stick that 6ft long so that you can make sure you stay apart)

 

Using activity to beat your boredom!

You might be used to being active with group classes, the gym, or even your job! 

When you’re stuck at home, it can be a bit harder to find the motivation to be active. But there are actually so many fun things to do at home!

Try some of these:

7. Virtual Dance class

8. Virtual yoga class – having a set class is really great because it will give you the motivation and accountability to actually do it

9. Try some fun instagram workouts (here are my favourite workout accounts)

10. Go for a walk and listen to a podcast (funny or educational)

11. Work towards a goal – (mine is to do a headstand and run for 30 mins without a break). *fun fact, setting yourself a goal, tracking your progress will give you the motivation to start (when you don’t feel like getting off your butt) and it will fuel you to keep going – here’s a free goal planner that also comes with a habit tracker!

12. Plan an outdoor adventure! If you have some green space around you (that’s fairly unpopulated – remember social distancing), you can plan to have a little day where you can go around and do things!

Super Fun Things To do When You’re Bored

(be warned, most of my ideas involve dancing)

let’s be real, all of the options are super fun, but these didn’t really fit into a category)

13. Dance party (to great music – see next idea)

14. Make some awesome playlists for all your different moods

15. Learn a fun dance (think Napolean Dynamite dance, or the evolution of dance, dance). Here are a couple online dance classes you can try! There’s one for belly dance and ballroom dancing!

16. If you have family in your house with you – try a board game. These are my favourites!

17. Do a photo scavenger hunt! This gives you a purpose to go outside and have some fun!

18. Throw pillows in the air and try to karate kick them! Okay, I know this sounds kinda crazy, but it can be so much fun to just let loose and be super silly!

19. Make a video – you can make it to be funny, creative, whatever! That’s what I’ve been doing and I think I’ve made some gems!

20. Have a picnic in your backyard or on your porch! Even if it’s just you or maybe someone you live with!

21. Build a blanket fort! Who says they’re just for kids?

22. Play cards

23. Play a board game

24. Set up a murder mystery game with your friends (online!)

25. Play facebook messenger games with your friends

26. Try streaming on twitch – they give money to people who have a certain number of streams!

27. Start a tiktok account! It’s a great way to just have some fun, and who knows, maybe you’ll get some followers?

28. Get your home garden going and get yourself a plant! (you can even look into finding a plant outside and re-potting it to a plant in your home!) Anything can be a flowerpot with some imagination!

29. Make a cool DIY flower pot for your new plants! It can be as simple as painting an old yogurt container (but you can get fancier if you want!)

Goal-Oriented Boredom-Busters

Having well-defined goals that you are passionate about is a great way to beat boredom!

My goals are what keep me motivated and moving every day!

(If you want some extra help with goals, you can sign up for my free goal planner and course below!)

Here are some great ways to beat boredom with your goals!

30. Plan your dream career

31. Make a vision board – you can either make one with some craft supplies or make a virtual one on Pinterest!

32. Plan your craziest dream

33. Create a bucket list for the summer!

34. Create a habit or self-discipline goal (you can use this habit tracker and goal planner!)

35. Read a book on your related goal

36. Start a youtube channel on something you’re knowledgable about

37. Start a blog on something you’re knowledgable (or something you want to learn about)

Inspirational Ideas to Beat Boredom

Similar to the goal-oriented activities, this one can also help get rid of some boredom and create a spark in your life!

38. Plan your next trip! Even the act of planning something fun can boost your endorphins and make you feel great!

39. Read an inspirational book, here’s a great list.

40. Find and download some inspirational podcasts!

50. Reach out to someone you find inspirational for a chat.

60. Look into personal development courses!

Traditionally Productive Things You Can Do From Home

I already consider a lot of the things on this list to be productive, but here are some more really good ones!

61. Start a financial spreadsheet (boring I know, but this will help you in the long run)

62. Create a cleaning schedule. If you don’t have one, you are seriously missing out, this will improve your life so much! (You can get a simple one when you sign up with my goal planner – I give you a bit of everything to start living your best life!)

63. Blast some music and actually clean up! I always feel super satisfied after doing a good clean!

64. Start one thing that you have been putting off!

65. Meal prep – I made a super helpful meal prep workbook you can get here!

66. Clean your house! (See the organization section below!)

67. Make an inventory of things that would make your life easier, like cleaning supplies or organizational tools!

68. Make a list of ways you can simplify your life. This will make you feel better and more free. It will also free up some space for more fun things!

69. Do a survey, like swagbucks or others, to get a little extra money! Great if you’re totally bored!

70. Do you like making jewelry or highly lucrative face masks? Start an etsy account! You can even check out this course that can teach you how to make some fun self-care stuff!

71. Start or plan a side hustle! Figure out what interests you, what you’re good at, and what you could make some money at and take a stab at it! You can make your first sales over instagram, etsy, or facebook marketplace! (And if you want some tips, contact me on this page and I can give you some tips! 

72. Do that thing that you’ve been meaning to for forever that you just haven’t gotten to yet! The time is now! (not singling you out btw, we all have that one thing!)

73. Make a plan for that one project that you need to get done. 

Organizational

I know pretty much everyone has tried to do some organizing, but you should try it!

If you hate doing stuff like that (like I do), set a timer for 5 mins and just start! And play some music – I guarantee it will help!

Here are some things you can organize!

74. Your jewelry

75. Your makeup Bag

76. Your bathroom

77. Your kitchen (and that one cupboard that is always overflowing!)

78. Your closet

Creative things to do when you’re bored

Our minds are so vast and such an incredible source of creativity! Try harnessing some of that, you might be surprised and find that you’re actually a lot more creative than you thought you were!

79. Re-decorate your space!

80. Find some diy projects that would improve your home – or that you just find fun!

81. Try writing some poetry!

82. Have old clothes lying around? Try upcycling it! Just go to pinterest and there are TONS of cool ideas!

83. Musically inclined? Try writing a song!

84. Do some origami! It’s very fun, and always a cool party trick!

85. Are you good at drawing? Try making a fun little comic!

86. Have you ever wanted to make a video? I find making them very fun and you don’t even have to post it anywhere

87. Plan out gifts for your friends’ and family members’ birthdays this year

Self-Care Related Activities

This is an amazing time to practice your self-care, or if you’re a newbie – start a self-care ritual or routine!

88. Try some journaling – here’s an article on how to do some simple stream-of-consciousness journaling

89. Focus on self-improvement. Shameless plug here: try my free mini-anxiety course!

90. Write 5 things you are grateful for!

91. Practice self love – you can use my self-love journaling exercises

92. Make your room more cozy and calm – consider getting some twinkly lights and a salt lamp!

93. Tape an inspirational note to your mirror

Bring back your nostalgia

I’m a very sentimental person and I have a lot of fond memories of my childhood. If you’re the same, it could be fun to go on a nice little trip down memory lane!

Here are some easy and fun things you can do!

94. Ask your parents if you have any old photos or home videos to look at

95. Make a cootie-catcher or one of these awesome 3-D puzzles!

96. Get a jump rope

97. Get some chalk and play hopscotch

98. Go get some old candies that you loved when you were a kid – order them online or see if your local grocery store has them!

99. Remake a favourite childhood recipe!

100. Make a photo album of old pictures

And that’s it folks!

There are SO many things you can do when you’re bored at home!

 You just have to be slightly creative – or read my blog! 😉

If you’re interested in being a bit more productive during this time (not that you need to, that’s totally fine!). But if you do, you should check out my free little productivity and time management course! As someone who has been working from home for a long time, I know that it can be a big annoying adjustment.

It’s hard to know what to do with your time or even find the energy to do anything! So I wanted to make something to help!

 You can sign up below!

Sagesse ("Say Jess")

Sagesse ("Say Jess")

Owner of Mindaya

Hey guys, it’s Sagesse – the face behind website! I’m dedicated to helping you find freedom your anxiety and overcome the mental obstacles that are standing in the way of your best life!
3 Scheduling Mistakes That Are Destroying Your Productivity (And how to fix them!)

3 Scheduling Mistakes That Are Destroying Your Productivity (And how to fix them!)

If you’re struggling to figure out why you’re productivity is bombing, it could be because of one or more of these three counter-intuitive reasons.

Before we get into the nitty-gritty of productivity, I want to address one big misconception about productivity – and that is that you don’t need to be productive all the time.

It is perfectly normal to not have productive days.

I have not met anyone who doesn’t have days where they just don’t get much done. It happens to everyone, we just don’t see their behind-the-scenes life!

Also, life isn’t about being a productivity machine and your worth as a human being also isn’t measured by your productivity.

But productivity can improve your life.

The reason I became obsessed with productivity and effectivity, which I will get to later, is because I was having a lot of unproductive days (which is ok), but I found that it was causing me to waste my own time.

I was used to lazily, “half-doing” my work in efforts to not get too stressed out, BUT THEN I found myself working all day and then feeling tired and burnt out!

I knew that the better option would be to get more work done in less time, and then have more time to properly relax or do things that I enjoyed!

That’s why I want to talk about productivity. And more specifically, scheduling for productivity!

So that you can get the same amount done in way less time, and thus have more time for the important things in life!

So let’s get into the top scheduling mistakes that are destroying your productivity!

Disclaimer: Products on this page may contain affiliate links. We only promote products that we think are super awesome and will provide value to you! You can read more about our terms here.

 #1 You are doing too much or you think you have to do too much

This is a very common misconception for productivity. You want to get tons of things done and you start comparing yourself to other people who seem to be doing a lot, and then you get overwhelmed with work.

This is bad for two reasons. 

 1 – our brains are wired for focus and NOT multitasking.

Having too many things on the go means that your brain can’t fully focus on one thing. Also to do anything right and produce meaningful results, you need to put quite a bit of time and effort into it.

 2 – Doing a small amount of things really well is WAY better than doing a ton of things just ok

Anybody who has done anything great has been very focused. Which means that they have done ONLY the things that have furthered them towards their goals.

And it also might seem like they did it quickly (which might influence you to think that you should be doing things faster), in actuality, it took them a lot longer than you might think to get where they are.

The same things goes for trying to implement good habits or change bad ones, it takes a lot longer than you think to change a habit or make a new one, and it usually takes very small steps to get to a fully changed habit. 

Many people who are super organized, super diligent about exercise, or whatever it might be – have practiced for years or have even more of an advantage because they were raised that way, so those habits are engrained into them.

So if you’re trying to implement a bunch of things that you’re not used to doing, it’s going to take a while. So stay patient and take small steps towards your goals!

#2 You’re actually not even doing the right things 

On top of trying to do too much and reaching for goals on an unrealistic timeline, there’s also the problem of not doing the right things. Sure you might be busy, but are you being productive? And ya you can be productive, but are you being effective?

Being productive means nothing if you’re not doing things that are furthering you towards your goals?

When I was studying in university, my study habits were sometimes pretty good, I was doing work the whole time with limited distractions.

BUT I was doing all the questions that I knew how to do pretty well. I wasn’t studying the harder questions and concepts that would have really furthered my knowledge and helped me on the exams. 

There’s a little rule: find the 20% of things you do that bring you 80% of the results. 

So study those harder questions, make that phone call that will get you that sale, sit down and grind out the details of that hard project!

And take some time to actually figure out what that 20% is that actually gives you results! 

Once you do that, all of the other things will start to feel much less heavy because you’ll be doing the things that MATTER!

#3 You think you don’t have enough time

Alright, so in our first productivity misconception, the point was that sometimes things take more time than you think – and by that I mean: your long term goals!

With smaller tasks in your day, such as exercising, cooking, cleaning, putting in a little extra time for our friends and family – these tasks are vital for your wellbeing and realistically, they don’t have to take too long!

With these sorts of tasks, there’s a pesky little saying, which is “I don’t have enough time”

Sometimes, this is a good attitude to have if you’re saying no to things that are not really important (like someone at work asking you to do something that is not within your scope or something like that).

BUT for things like taking care of your body and making time for the people you love, or the overall maintenance of your day-to-day life, like cooking and cleaning, you need to make time..

You MUST make time for things like cooking, cleaning, and exercising (and getting enough sleep)

These are essential to your health, happiness, and the overall ease of your everyday life. So you need to make time.

You don’t need to do ALL the things EVERY DAY, but you have to make time in your schedule and make these things a priority, or else your health will suffer (and then your productivity and goals will suffer too!)

And, more often than not, you will realize that it’s not about the time it takes to do these things, it’s about whether you want to do them or not.

My solution?

First and foremost: remind yourself why these things are important and that you need to do them. Oftentimes, the things we “don’t have time for” are the things that are going to contribute the most to our long term success.

Example: healthy eating and exercise

They will make you more alert and in a better mood, and will improve your energy levels and productivity. So essentially, they will make you more productive.

So, here’s how to get them done:

  • Schedule in specific time slots in your calendar for these activities that you just need to get done and you know don’t take a ton of time
  • Find ways to make them more fun – make sure you have some music or a podcast ready on your phone before you go do them! Or let yourself have a small reward after you’re done!
  • Make is as easy as possible for yourself to start these tasks. Have your work out clothes ready, make sure your kitchen is clean at the end of the day, make you that you have all the things you need to make cooking easier (i.e. prepped veggies, the right spatula, baking sheets, etc.), and have a cleaning schedule, so you know exactly what you should clean and when!

So to avoid productivity mistakes

The moral of the story is:

Do more of the good things and less of the things that don’t matter!

If you want some extra help with your productivity, time management, and doing the right things for your goals and your overall wellbeing – check out my productivity course!

It’s actually not just a productivity course – it’s a time management, goal-setting, mindset, organization, and much more all rolled into one! And it’s FREE! So what’s are you waiting for?

Sign up!

Sagesse ("Say Jess")

Sagesse ("Say Jess")

Owner of Mindaya

Hey guys, it’s Sagesse – the face behind website! I’m dedicated to helping you find freedom your anxiety and overcome the mental obstacles that are standing in the way of your best life!
5 Trade Secrets For Maintaining Willpower While Working From Home

5 Trade Secrets For Maintaining Willpower While Working From Home

Working from home. Sounds pretty nice, right?

It’s something that a lot of us would love and even try to build a life around it (i.e. me).

But for some, it can be a bit of a nightmare. (also me)

A lot of people actually rely on the ritual and accountability that working at a workplace can have.

I really know that feeling, the ONLY thing that would get me out of bed in the morning for years was the fear that I would get fired for being late! And sometimes, not even that would help (I was late for work A LOT, whoops!)

Working from home takes a crazy amount of discipline and willpower, especially during a pandemic when your motivation is at an all-time low!

Fortunately, as a seasoned work-from-home-er (and as someone who generally relies on accountability to get things done), I know the struggles that accompany working from home – and I have some awesome and unusual tips for overcoming them!

Disclaimer: Products on this page may contain affiliate links. We only promote products that we think are super awesome and will provide value to you! You can read more about our terms here.

Top tips for maintaining willpower at home! (during a pandemic!)

Now there are a few standards – like having a daily routine and a dedicated workspace that are important, but these tips will go a bit further than that!

My first few tips are pretty standard, thought definitely worth mentioning,  and the last few are where things get interesting!

Tip 1: Get creative with your motivation

I think that one of the biggest reasons for my willpower and discipline is that I have very big goals! And I’m very excited to achieve those goals.

That being said, sometimes on a daily basis, it can be hard to maintain motivation when those goals are so far away.

That’s why I also like using daily motivation strategies.

For example: I hate waking up early (but I know it’s good for me) – so I try to make getting up as nice and easy as possible. So I chose my alarm music to be a song that I really like and when I wake up I make myself a latte (which I really look forward to!)

Another way to motivate yourself daily is to plan something you really enjoy doing for after you finish work! And only let yourself do it if you have completed the task!

But sometimes you need a bit more motivation than that. The laziness is real, folks!

Sometimes, “just planning something fun” isn’t going to be enough motivation.

So here are a couple even more creative things you can do to maintain your motivation!

 1. Keep yourself on track with a friend. Having a sense of accountability is the best way to motivate yourself, but you can lose that when you’re all alone at home.

Instead, get a friend to check in on you to make sure you have done what you were supposed to and you can do the same for them!

2. For extra motivation – put some money on it! The website stickK allows you to place money on yourself, like a bet. If you do your task, you can keep your money.

If you don’t, then the money gets sent to charity (or a charity or person that you don’t like, which is further motivation to stick with it)! This honestly might be the best motivator! 

Tip 2: Eliminate distractions as much as possible

When you don’t have to worry about your boss peering over your shoulder while you’re “taking a break” and looking at videos of puppies eating cheetos, it can be very tempting to get caught up in the weird, but entrancing rabit hole of instagram or facebook videos.

There are also other at-home distractions, such as your family and your oh-so-cozy-looking bed!

Here are a few ways to eliminate those distractions.

  • Use Freedom – it’s an app that blocks whatever you want across all devices. So it blocks website AND apps! You can check it out here here! It has helped me SO MUCH to not browse facebook and instagram all the time!
  • Have your designated workspace that is secluded (or if you don’t have an extra room, try and face a wall or something, so you don’t look at things that might distract you!
  • Have a do-not disturb sign of some sort, so that your family knows not to disturb you when you’re in a deep focus mode!

Tip 3: Find ways to use your willpower LESS

Your daily willpower is limited. And your willpower gets used for every single decision you have to make.

And it is deceiving how many decisions you make in a day!

What kind of breakfast will you have? What will you have for lunch?

Where will your desk be for the day? And should you work on the oh-so-comfy-looking couch?

Will you work out before you work or after you work? What will your workout be?

And as trivial as these may seem, they are slowly depleting you of your will power!

So the solution?

Plan as many things as you can for the day – in advance!

And when you work from home, there are just that many more decisions!

Such as:

Where will I work? When will I have lunch? When will I start work?

When you work from home, your day almost becomes too flexible and ends up hindering your ability to do work.

Things you can plan:

  • your workout clothes (set them out the night before)
  • what days you will work out and what time
  • your meals for the day (you can try my meal planner!)
  • when you eat
  • when you start and stop work
  • where you’re working – like I said, have a dedicated workspace! Or if you like variety, have different workspaces, but plan when you’ll use them.

And again, invest in a productivity app, like freedom or todoist, to keep you on track!

Tip 4: Don’t try to do too much!

This is a common problem for everyone ever. Not to exaggerate, but I think I’m right.

It can be even more tempting when you’re working from home because you have all this magical time because you don’t have a commute and people distracting you at work.

But there’s a little thing called the planning fallacy that you need to keep in mind.

The Planning Fallacy is a human tendency to overestimate how much we can do in a day.

Spoiler alert: you can do a lot LESS than you think you can in a day.

That sounds like a bit of a pessimistic thing to say, but it will actually help you achieve much MORE in life!

Doing less will guarantee that you do it, rather than the alternative: which is planning too many things, getting overwhelmed, and then not doing it.

Over time, you’ll get more done every day if you just stick to things that are manageable.

And most importantly….

TAKE BREAKS!!!

When you work from home, it can be very tempting to try to work as much as possible, in an attempt to get things done earlier in the day! That’s a good idea, right?

Well, yes, if you’re doing it right, but doing it right, involves taking BREAKS!

Your brain absolutely needs a break and it also needs fuel, which brings me to my next point…

Tip 5: Eating properly and drinking water!

If I don’t eat properly, I CANNOT concentrate!

There’s lots of evidence out there about drinking water and eating the right foods and the impact they can have on your concentration.

I know from personal experience that the days I eat healthier are the days where I feel the most energized and able to concentrate!

I actually eat a huge breakfast with a balance of fats, protein, and carbs – plus lots of veggies and fruit!

AND I try to drink a ton of water when I wake up to make sure I get hydrated. (This actually influences my concentration the most)

Also, remember that your brain runs on glucose, so you need carbs for it to work properly!! This doesn’t necessarily mean refined carbs and sugars, but things like fruit, potatoes, and whole grains.

The takeaways for developing and maintaining willpower!

  • Be creative about your motivation
  • Eliminate as many distractions as possible
  • Use your willpower LESS
  • Don’t do too much (and take breaks!)
  • Eat properly and drink water (i.e. take care of your body)
  • Most importantly, listen to your body and go easy on yourself!

Some days will be easier than others – and that’s OK! No one can be 100% everyday, so go easy on yourself! Especially now – it’s a goal pandemic y’all – it’s ok if you’re not disciplined 24/7 and doing 110 things a day.

Sagesse ("Say Jess")

Sagesse ("Say Jess")

Owner of Mindaya

Hey guys, it’s Sagesse – the face behind website! I’m dedicated to helping you find freedom your anxiety and overcome the mental obstacles that are standing in the way of your best life!